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Dear Ted #14

I talked to your mom today for her birthday.  She sounded good, but she did sound a bit absent minded.  I think the infection and the pneumonia still has a hold on her brain a bit.  She did say Christmas wasn't going to be the same without you, that she keeps expecting to talk to you.

I thought about you a lot today.  I got a little choked up a couple of times.  One of those being when I was talking to your mom.  But, I was also thinking about how I never lost faith in the fact that you loved me.  Never, once, did I ever question that love you had for me.  And I never felt I could not trust you.  I've never had that before.  And I had the greatest man in the world, even when you were cranky, and now you're gone. 

It's almost Christmas.  It's going to be a test on me.  I have done the bare minimum to make it through.  And even that was probably half assed.  I finally sent cards to Randi and Dee and the grandkiddos there, with some money.  I don't know if I'll be able to do that anymore.  I don't know what I'll be able to do next year at all.  We'll see what the future holds.

I miss you so much.  I still can't believe I'll never hear your voice again.  Please know I love you with my whole heart. 

I wanted to add a picture of us.  This is from Mexico.  We had so many wonderful times together. 



#loveyoumissyou

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